25 going on 15... and 45.

When did this happen? In May after discovering that my mother had been contemplating plastic surgery, I meditated, both in my head and out loud to some WEDYHTD contributors, about how foreign the phenomenon of aging was to me. I didn’t understand it, I am young and changes in my face and body still feel like part of growth into, who I’ll ultimately be, as opposed to a decline from who I was.
Later in the month, I turned 25 and I welcomed the flip of the calendar. Twenty five felt right, it was maturation without turning “old.” Obviously 25 isn’t old, Mid-twenties was solidly upon me and I felt fine about it.
I spent a good deal of time traveling with my 15 yr old sister in June and July and while, granted, she looks older than 15, somehow this lead people we met to think I was much younger than 25. This frustrated me. I think because I equate age with progress. So much has happened since I was fifteen, there is a world of difference between the summer after freshman year in high school and… now. I’ve lived halfway across the country from where I grew up for seven years. I’ve traveled to five continents since I was fifteen, I’ve developed talents and vices and a sense of self and confidence and direction and... I'm about to start PROFESSIONAL SCHOOL for christ's sake… being mistaken for younger than I am seems to somehow diminish the importance of what has transpired since that age.
At the same time, my sister at some point decided on this trip that calling me “old” was really the way get my goat. And while my goat wasn’t actually got (hopefully wit is something she’ll develop in college,) what stuck was that she grouped me with “adults.” Whether they’re 25 or 45 or 72, adults don’t like to be called old.
And since I’ve returned I’ve been feeling rather old. It’s not just visiting the babies of friends, or the babies of 17yr olds I’ve known since they were born… but it’s accidentally buying facial cleanser for “maturing skin” and then realizing maybe it’s not such a bad idea. It’s realizing I’d better grow my hair out now, because I don’t have too long until it’ll be tacky. It’s seeing where the wrinkles will be and looking at pictures of friends and seeing their age, not that they just don’t look like kids anymore, but they look older than they did when they stopped looking like kids. It’s worrying about something like cholesterol, a diet and lifestyle change that doesn’t have to do with vanity but with evading a stroke? This is old people stuff.
But this, I think, is the nature of the age. And it needs its own term, At twenty five, car insurance premiums go down. And at twenty-six, health insurance premiums go up. We’re in this strange limbo where we’re seeing the beginnings of wrinkles while worrying about the recurrence of pimples.